Poker Poker Humor — 05 December 2004

Many players will tell you that online poker tells either don’t exist or are difficult to judge. That’s a load. All the online pros know the tells but it’s some sort of unspoken rule never to let others in on it. Well, that ends right now! I will share with my loyal readers 5 of the top online poker tells that they (and we know who “they” is, don’t we?) don’t want you to know about.

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arrow 3 Reliable Online Poker Tells

Steaming/Tilt

Here’s a subtle clue that your opponent is on tilt.

tell steam Reliable Online Poker Tells

Notice the smoke coming out of the player’s ears? That’s a dead giveaway!

The Fishy Player

Ever wonder if that runner, runner suck out was brilliant play or you’ve found yourself an uber-fish? Guess no more. Just take a look at the fishy tells this guy is giving off.

tell fishy Reliable Online Poker Tells

No need to wait until you have 100 hands on this guy in PokerTracker. You’ve got this guy’s number cold.

Strong

Ever find yourself sitting on a questionable hand like KJo and wonder if you should try to limp in? Well, take a look around the table. If you see this tell, get out of the hand as quickly as possible.

tell shocked Reliable Online Poker Tells

Maniac

There’s Loose / Aggressive Bad and then there’s Loose / Aggressive Good. If you see this tell, find another table.

tell gus Reliable Online Poker Tells

Deception

This isn’t really a tell so much as a warning. She’s a man, baby!!! That’s an Adam’s apple.

tell sheaman Reliable Online Poker Tells

If you enjoyed this post check out our Poker Humor section where we have a ton more like it.

 Reliable Online Poker Tells

About

Bill Rini has been working in the online poker industry since 2004. He was a product manager for poker at Full Tilt and was the poker room manager at PartyPoker.

 

Bill has been blogging about online poker since 2003 and is considered one of the leading authorities on the online poker industry.

 

“I like What Bill Rini said in his blog” – Doyle Brunson

 

“In other news, we had Bill Rini write an absolutely home run blog.” Daniel Negreanu

 

“Industry insider Bill Rini has one of the most popular blogs in poker, with thousands of subscribers and fans regularly coming back for his universally respected insight into the industry” – Barry Carter (News editor for PokerStrategy, Co-Author: The Mental Game of Poker)

Ship It Holla Ballas!

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About Author

Bill Rini has been working in the online poker industry since 2004. He was a product manager for poker at Full Tilt and was the poker room manager at PartyPoker.

 

Bill has been blogging about online poker since 2003 and is considered one of the leading authorities on the online poker industry.

 

“I like What Bill Rini said in his blog” – Doyle Brunson

 

“In other news, we had Bill Rini write an absolutely home run blog.” Daniel Negreanu

 

“Industry insider Bill Rini has one of the most popular blogs in poker, with thousands of subscribers and fans regularly coming back for his universally respected insight into the industry” – Barry Carter (News editor for PokerStrategy, Co-Author: The Mental Game of Poker)

(16) Readers Comments

  1. Damn, why didn’t I read this years ago…I coulda saved a lot of money!

  2. This will help out!

  3. the stong one….uahhhhh..simply great

  4. Reliable Online Poker Tells is actually funny, not alot of fun on poker blogs. Most people forget that poker, is still a fun game.

  5. unbelivably funny but i thought id get tips, would just like to say that i found out about this software that you can use to cheat with on on-line poker games. i find this worringly ridiculous. i play for hours and wonder how an idiot could call me and hit runner runner to win.

  6. Why are the images not working

  7. while I’know’ tht u r bing ‘sarcastic’ -wht’s the dlw/ alleged online ‘scanners’?

  8. Pingback: Las Vegas and Poker Blog

  9. She’s very beautiful ( for a man ).

  10. Between this and the cheating on Party you are saving me 5BB an hour, thanks

  11. OMG. Freakin’ hilarious!

  12. just sent you an email, mister. might be in LA in Jan if this interview goes well. see you across the felt soon!

  13. Hilarious! I’ll have to turn my avatars on, look at all the tells I’m missing.

  14. Priceless. You’re killing me with these…

  15. Very nice

  16. OMG, another score! Hilarious!

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