Poker Poker Humor — 19 November 2005
paulaabdul1 The Poker Wisdom of Paula Abdul Jalib

One of the first pieces of poker wisdom HDouble turned me on to was the vast body of poker strategy written by Abdul. Over the years, I’ve studied Abdul’s writings in the hopes of deciphering her mysterious poker advice. Some of it, I’ve never been able to figure out. For instance, in Rush-Rush, here is what I was able to take away from it. I’m sure there’s more but this was as much as I could absorb at this stage in my poker development.

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arrow 3 The Poker Wisdom of Paula Abdul Jalib

You’re the whisper of a summer breeze
You’re the kiss that puts my soul at ease
What’s I’m sayin’ is I’m into you
Here’s my story, and the story goes
You give love
You get love
And more than heaven knows
You’re gonna see

So, what I think Abdul is saying here is that when you get a rush of cards, it’s like a whisper of a summer breeze. I have to agree there and I’m not sure I see any sort of special wisdom in that statement. But, “You give love, You get love,” now that’s a message. Love is action. Action is love. So if you give action, you get action. If you’ve been playing like a rock all afternoon and you suddenly hit a rush, you won’t get action unless you’ve been giving action. I see where she’s going with this now.

I’m gonna run, I’m gonna try
I’m gonna take this love right to ya
All my heart, all the joy
Oh, baby, baby, please

Again, she continues on the theme of getting action on your good hands. She’s not slow playing (“I’m gonna take this love/action right to ya”) but she’s really hoping to get a call (“Oh, baby, baby, please”).

Rush, rush
Hurry, hurry lover, come to me
Rush, rush
I wanna feel, I wanna feel you breathe in me
Rush, rush
I can feel it, I can feel you all through me
Rush, rush
Oh, what you do to me

I’m going to have to keep reading more of her work because I seriously don’t know if she’s talking about the cards or her opponent here.

And all I ask of you is what you are
And even if you’re right next to me
It’s still too far away
When I’m not inside your arms
I get traumatic, baby, yes I know
But I want you
I need you
Oh, man, I love you so
You’re gonna see

Ok, now we’re back into stuff I understand. She’s saying that she wants all of her opponent’s chips (“all I ask of you is what you are”) but I’m not sure if I totally understand her emphasis on position here (“even if you’re right next to me, It’s still to far away”). Regardless, I think it’s obvious to say she’s expressing frustration when her opponents are taking too long to call (“When I’m not inside your arms, I get traumatic, baby, yes I know”).

When you kiss me up and down
Turn my senses all around
Oh, baby, oh, baby
I don’t know just how or why
But no one else has touched me so deep, so deep
So deep inside

Now this was a little tricky but I think when she talks about kisses, she’s really talking about getting action. So, when you get her action, her senses get turned all around. She also admits she’s not totally sure what causes this psychological reaction but Abdul has always been more about the mathematics and strategy than she’s been about the psychology of the game. I guess one is left to research that on their own.

I hope that in working through Abdul’s theory of Card Rushes I have offered some insight into Paula Abdul’s writings.

 The Poker Wisdom of Paula Abdul Jalib

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Bill Rini has been working in the online poker industry since 2004. He was a product manager for poker at Full Tilt and was the poker room manager at PartyPoker. Currently, Bill is the Head of Online Poker for WSOP.

 

Bill has been blogging about online poker since 2003 and is considered one of the leading authorities on the online poker industry.

 

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Bill Rini has been working in the online poker industry since 2004. He was a product manager for poker at Full Tilt and was the poker room manager at PartyPoker. Currently, Bill is the Head of Online Poker for WSOP.

 

Bill has been blogging about online poker since 2003 and is considered one of the leading authorities on the online poker industry.

 

“I like What Bill Rini said in his blog” – Doyle Brunson

 

“In other news, we had Bill Rini write an absolutely home run blog.” Daniel Negreanu

 

“Industry insider Bill Rini has one of the most popular blogs in poker, with thousands of subscribers and fans regularly coming back for his universally respected insight into the industry” – Barry Carter (News editor for PokerStrategy, Co-Author: The Mental Game of Poker)

(0) Readers Comments

  1. Pingback: Bill’s Poker Blog » Poker Wisdom of Paula Abdul - Tournament Strategy

  2. Pingback: Bill s Poker Blog The Poker Wisdom of Paula Abdul-Jalib - Paula Abdul Links

  3. This may very well be the best treatment of a Paula Abdul song since Showcase played “Straight Up” on the trumpet at his Bar Mitzvah.

  4. Funny as hell…best post I have read in a while.

  5. And I thought that the dry well that is poker humor had been drained dry. Absolutely hilarious Bill.

  6. That’s gold, Rini, GOLD!

  7. And let’s not forget perhaps the best and most immortal advice from Adbul:

    Do do you love me
    Do do you love me
    Do do you love me
    Do do you love me?

    Great post.

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