Trepidation and Nuisance in Las Vegas

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It was Wednesday evening, early Thursday morning when our rented hybrid Ford Escape rolled into downtown Las Vegas. Normally the energy of Sin City zaps a second wind into the weary traveler but she held out no such power boost this trip and I was more than happy to crank of the AC to -50 F and slip into a semi-coma.

Thanksgiving day was spent as millions of other families spend it, at the Plaza playing in a satellite into the Ultimate Poker Championship. Henry decided to just buy in for the $500 and play but I thought I might get away with anteing up $65 and win my way into the next day’s event.

I thought there might be a little problem when the guy who just sold Henry a placard for the $500 event because he “already had two” was seated at my table. Everyone at the table seemed to know each other and I’m sure they were looking at me like I was the proverbial sucker. I played well and when we found ourselves down to the final three I felt I had a pretty good chance. Unfortunately, I was the short stack and needed to find a place to double up. I thought I found it and got all my money in pre-flop only to be called by a lesser hand that went on to make a straight and bust me. That would soon become the theme of the weekend.

Encouraged by my results in the first satellite I decided to give it another try. I was seated at a table with far more fishy looking players than the first table and I was certain that I was winning this one. About three orbits in, I pick up AK UTG. I pop it for a 3x raise and MP pushes all-in. Only two hands are far enough ahead of me here that I’m going to lay this down and I don’t think he has AA or KK. I call and he flips up AQ. What’s that, a 70/20 favorite? Good news is I caught my K on the river but with JT also on the board it made my opponent’s straight and I was once again denied due to the killer straight. I smiled, grabbed my stuff and started drinking heavily.

Friday Henry and I decided to try our luck over at the Bellagio. We made the long trek up the strip from downtown as live cactus offers beaconed to us from the world’s largest souvenir stand and the scary Circus Circus clown towered above us in a taunting manner. He picked a $20/$40 or $30/$60 table and I was happy to find a nice little $8/$16 on the rail so I could watch the pretty ladies pass on their way to the Cirque du Soliel show du jour.

Interesting would be a good way to describe the table. I had angry poker expert on my left who seemed to change seats every time someone left. Next to him was older than dirt Vegas local rock guy. To my right were three Middle Eastern guys who each made Gus Hanson look like a tight player. Variance at that table was a bitch. The gamblers would raise and re-raise with hands like A6o UTG and build up these monster pots. Great if you win it but it sucks if the river sinks you.

Here was a typical hand:

Pick up AQ in MP and it’s raised in front of me. I re-raise and pick up the Middle East trio. Flop comes AT7. Sweet! EP Middle East dude bets, I raise and the other two call. Turn is a 4. EP bets, I raise and the other two finally figure out they’re beat and fold. River is a T. Dammit!!! EP bets, I call and he shows T9o.

Later I would return the favor when I pick up AT and the flop comes AA5. I bet, a new player raises, everybody folds to me and I re-raise. He calls and the turn is a 9. I bet, he raises, and now I’m starting to wonder if I might be in trouble. I call. River is a T. Booya! I bet, he calls, and flips up 55.

The funny part about the Middle East trio is that these guys were sucking out major pots with crappy cards but when someone would make a straight or a small flush against them they would sit there steaming and yelling “Oh, oh, we play like that, huh? Ok, ok, now I play the crap cards like you and maybe I win.”

Unfortunately for Henry and me, the Big Game was a little light. I saw Doyle, Chan, Gus, Chau Giang and a few others but everyone else seemed to be in Monaco for the Full Tilt Invitational.

Henry and I made our way back to the Treasure Island parking lot where we parked the car. As we walked around the lot we both began to sense that we were where we parked yet the car was nowhere in sight. We made at least four laps around the entire lot with no luck in finding the vehicle. I told Henry that I was going to go down to speak with security and he waited in the lot and walked around a few more laps.

As I walked through the casino I couldn’t help but be struck by the fact that none of this seemed familiar. I didn’t remember a lot of the shops and various attractions. I spun around and went back to the parking lot where I asked Henry whether or not we parked in the Treasure Island lot. When we had entered the parking area there was a turnoff for the Treasure Island and one for the Mirage. I had gotten cut off and we ended up going to the Mirage parking lot instead. Of course, when we went to the Mirage lot, the car was exactly where we thought it was.

Saturday, before returning to the Plaza to extract my revenge, I headed over to Binion’s and bought into one of their tournaments. I last two hours and busted out about half way through the pack. Tough table. Here’s every hand played at my table.

EP limps for $50
MP limps for $50
LP limps for $50
Button raises to $1000
EP folds
MP folds
LP folds
Button shows ATo

After busting out I head up to the Plaza and get into a SnG. Some dude from Absolute Poker who was there with the hospitality crew for the UPC event shows his first three hands QQ, 88, TT. Nice. About ten hands into the tournament AP guy raises from EP, I look down at AJs and just call. Flop comes 722, two spades (I gotz da spades). He bets half the pot and I know damn well that that flop didn’t hit him so I push all-in. He goes into the tank long enough for other players to start griping and then he calls. He shows 55. Turn misses me but the river is a J and I take nearly his entire stack. Man was he pissed.

But just so the poker gods could demonstrate that there was a theme to this weekend, a few orbits later I pick up AA. Random medium stacked LP dude pushes all in. I . . . uh, call. He shows AT. How sweet is that? AA vs. AT. I’m like a 90% favorite. Well, I was a favorite until the flop came KQJ. Dammit!! While I was still trying to catch my breath from the knee to the groin I just took, I look down and find 99. I push the rest of my chips and the BB calls with 77. An 80% favorite!! I mean, you can’t lose as a 90% favorite and as an 80% favorite back to back can you? Flop comes 968. Dammit!!! Turn comes a 2. River is . . . T. Eat me!

I picked the wrong weekend to stop sniffing glue.

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